I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Randomize
