Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
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