so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
Randomize
