yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
Randomize