We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
Randomize
