Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
Blood and glitter go together right?
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
Randomize
