okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
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