i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
Randomize