I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
Randomize
