i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
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