On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
lets start a swedish sibling band together
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
His hands were made for my vagina.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
Randomize
