it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
