last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
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