and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
