then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
So never has there been a greater Valentine's Day gift than you actually putting a new roll of toilet paper on for me after using the old roll up! You didn't even use the new roll. You clearly put that on from a gentleman's standpoint vs. a selfish standpoint. I love you!!!!
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
Randomize
