left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
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