apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize