so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize