so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize
