i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
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