i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Pi�atas plus fireworks don't mix well
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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