normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
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