Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
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