how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Randomize
