i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
He texts me "what are you wearing" in the middle of the workday, so naturally I assume he's kidding and respond "the blood of my enemies" #foreveralone
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
