How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
Last time i carry you out of a forest
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Randomize
