So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
Randomize
