Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize
