Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
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