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• (614): View more from Ohio

  I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.

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• (989): View more from Michigan

  We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.

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• (715): View more from Wisconsin

  and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing

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• (202): View more from Washington, DC

  the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.

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• (336): View more from North Carolina

  You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch

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• (757): View more from Virginia

  So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.

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• (618): View more from Illinois

  Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.

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• (678): View more from Georgia

  Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...

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• (262): View more from Wisconsin

  Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.

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• (216): View more from Ohio

  After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory

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• (916): View more from California

  I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.

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• (810): View more from Michigan

  I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.

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• (870): View more from Arkansas

  I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.

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• (859): View more from Kentucky

  Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you

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• (313): View more from Michigan

  Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.

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