I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
