so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
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