You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
