it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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