Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
i just google imaged poop.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
The air taste purple.
Randomize
