I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize
