susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
Dignity is for republicans.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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