I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
Randomize
