Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
Randomize
