i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
I need to align my fucking chakras
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