is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
That awkward moment when you realize that last night you walked from in n out to petco, bought a mouse for $3, named it mogar, taught it how to skateboard on a techdeck, made it a home out of a trash can, fed it fruity pebbles and cheese, and then forgot where you left it.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
Randomize
