I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
Randomize
