Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
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