Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
I just got carded by a ten year old.
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
