Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
