Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize