When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
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I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
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