Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Randomize
