Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
It's like God shit irony all over that family
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
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