Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
Randomize