I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
